Ohhhhh. That means ‘unspeakable’, I think, but I use it as ‘unbelievable’.
Yea, a driving in Amman story. Haven’t had one in awhile, mish?
I was gearing up to climb a hill on a busy main street. Out of side-street, very clear, without looking, a white rental car zipped out and proceeded, very slowly, up the middle of the road.
Irritated, I honked loudly and decelerated. The usual response is a slow meandering toward the right.
NOT.
Cute girl slows further, stays middle, then proceeds to shuffle through her purse without even watching the road!
I could tell because my front-right bumper was about ready to eat her rear left, necessitating evasive action, slammed breaks, slammed on horn and shrieking from both cars. Her passengers were also cute and quite wide-eyed. She finally did swing right, just in time to avoid collision. I am not a speeder, btw, which my teen son will attest to.
I and my tires aged five years in two seconds.
I did the ’shu hada?’ (‘what was that all about?’) double wrist flip, and she flipped me off, and then drove into a subdivision.
It’s one of those days I was wishing I was a citizen cop. I decided to pretend I was one anyway, and followed her. It was a comical, female chase-scene, hard to zip through neighborhoods in pursuit with all those speed bumps. I gave up, wrote down her license number, and was ready to turn around, when I noticed the street she turned into was a dead-end and she was pulling out of a drive-way thinking I had gone.
I pulled around and blocked the street and rolled down my window.
Decision time. What to say? After a discussion a group of us had on the lack of grace (ie: being given something one has not earned) in this part of the world, I decided to give her grace.
She and friends were talking about what to do. She rolled down her window.
“Habeebti. Shu hada? Lemma enti tudkhuli issharia, la twaa’fi fi wasit lemma sayyarat am ptiiji wara3iki. Hada ghalat, ya helweh”
“Bas ana kunt am bafattsh isshi.”
“Bebaaayan, wa hada kamman ghalat. Enti bi sharia, mish la hailik. Ruuhi all yameen oo badayn bitshuufi wayn al mobile. Khaleeki eye-nayki 3ala sharia daymaan”. I smiled and continued:
“Bayni oo banik, yani, ashan enti jedeed bi swa’aa, bagoolik shagali. Irrijaal, hummi bidhahaku 3alayna niswaan oo banaat ashan sooluuuub mithal ma 3amilti, SA7?????” All the girls started giggling, whether my charming accent or the weird situation of getting lectured about road safety by a foreigner, I don’t know.
“FA, la khallihum ba7ku 3anna hayk, mish? Ba7ebbik, ya helwa, lazzim bitsoo’i ahsan min hayk min ajli kooolna siyidat, tab?” Laughter erupts.
“Sa7,mazboot, oo shukran…and be7ebbik kamaan.”
“Allah yakhaleelik iya. Masalama!
“Allah yaselmik!!”
Translation:
“Sweetheart, what in the world did you think you were doing back there??? For goodness sake, you must LOOK to see if it is before you enter a street. Cutie, you made a big mistake”
“ButI was looking for something in my bag”.
“Yea, that was clear. But the middle of the street is not the place to start going through your purse, you are not alone, pull over and look for your phone. Keep your eyes on the road always. Look, I like you: between you and me, and you being a new driver, let me tell you something. Men, they laugh at us for behavior like you just pulled, don’t they (they agree and giggle) “So let’s not give them an opportunity to continue, yea? we ladies need to stick together, drive better and don’t give them reason to, right?”
“Yes, that’s true, and I like you too”
“May God protect and keep you” (Seriously, that was a real prayer and not just a formality)
“May God give you peace”
“
