Drs Update + Jordanians, Believe in Yourselves!!!

This morning, hubby helped me hobble and wobble to see my Endo and Nuke Doctors. Dizziness is my newest hypo-hell symptom. It’s kind-of funny: get up too fast, turn head sideways, even turn-over waking up and I get dizzy! I am so light headed, it’s very very weird and not entirely unpleasant. It started happening Saturday at church, during worship I couldn’t stand for the weavy-feeling, and it wasn’t the Holy Spirit. A friend gave me an arm to walk the stairs, and I was thankful (even more for the sweet flowers she sent…thanks N!) I really tried to look somewhat presentable, but since I have to rest six times just brushing my teeth, hanging on tight to the sink, it was definitely not a Diva Lookalike Day.

Nuke Doc was at the elevator waiting for us, took one look at me and said “Oh, you are REALLY hypo, aren’t you?” and then ushered us into Endo Docs REAL office, the beautifully appointed inner sanctum with all the pictures of him with HRH. Uh-oh, I thought, is this where they give people bad news? His first words, with a big smile “Oh, you are REALLY hypo, please sit down”. It is very nice when doctors acknowledge you are not well.

“Mr. and Mrs. Kinzi, let me be brief as I can see she needs to rest. This is why we are meeting here, to save you sitting in the waiting room (whew). The total scan shows more tissue, but it is small and we DO NOT want to operate again, do we?” (No, no, no we shake our heads). Dr. Nuke and I believe the best course of action is now full ablation radiation therapy as soon as possible so you can begin taking thyroid replacement and get back to normal as soon as possible. (Yes, yes, yes we shake our heads). Good, good. Sunday you take the radiation, and Monday you begin the meds”. (YES YES YES!!!!) “I will leave you now in the qualified hands of Dr. Nuke”.

Dr. Nuke then took over, telling us the details of side-effects, dosage (600x more nuked than the dose of the big scan, whew), timing, low-iodine diet (no fish, no extra salt bas) isolation, and it won’t be a worst-case-scenario. I can be isolated at home, carefully, and may even make 2nd Thanksgiving! Wow. He is married, by the way.

I didn’t write this out before, but when Dr. Nuke gave me the news from the scan that he was strongly recommending the more aggressive treatment, he could see I was worried about being increasingly weak.  Endo doc’s intern, a young woman, said in Arabic: “Haram, shaiyifha, ma fee ishi?” He then walked away and  called Endo Doc (who was out of the country at a conference) and said – with all the animated Jordanian mannerisms: “Really, Dr. you should see her, she is suffering, can’t we even give her a bit of T3 before the scan??” I could hear Endo Doc say in response: “Of course she is suffering, I don’t want her to suffer, but we cannot compromise her thyroid levels for comfort, she is a mother, we have to think long range. She is strong, she will come through”. It about made me cry, they really cared about me as a patient.

It didn’t hit me until I was in Endo Doc’s office what a risk young Nuke Doc was taking in making that call. There was Dr-Appointed-By-And-Shakes-With-Kings, head of the Whole Center, decades of experience; being questioned by a much junior doctor. But Senior doctor has so much respect for and confidence in Junior Doctor, he is both available to take the question and give a straight answer without threat or taking personal insult.

I mentioned how thankful we are to Dr. Nuke for their team-work, for the great care I have received. Dr. Nuke said something interesting “It’s true. We provide superior care for our patients here than in many such centers in even America. I wish more Jordanians believed that. We have a problem, we Jordanians, we don’t believe in ourselves. Endo Doc, there are few like him. One Dr., I respectfully questioned his treatment of a patient you know what he said: “Don’t question me, or I will close your department”. What can we do with a response like that?” Imagine if Nuke Dr had decided to shut down and just say ‘haader’ to that other Dr. What a loss there would have been.

Jordanians, hadartkum esh, believe in your strengths. Take heart, be encouraged. You are a good people, a gifted people, a capable people.

I’m going to take heart, believe I have a Thanksgiving to attend, lean on the wall and go back to bed and enjoy my dizzy state.