Extreme Tea Parties (PLUS PHOTOS!!!! :)

Yesterday we had a house full of cowpokes, cowgirls, and some urban cowgirls. It was the date of the annual Girl Cousin Tea Party, organized by the oldest family cousin, Mona. The twelve girls, between six and eighteen years old, gather from across the MidWest for an after noon of fun and bonding doing themed girly-things: dressing up, eating, playing games and doing a craft. “Tea Parties’ to an extreme! The best part is the photo of all the girls at the beginning.

Two years ago it was a Disney Princess Party. Four years ago, a Minnie Mouse party. This year, the theme was Cowgirls. It looked like something out of Pioneer Woman around here. The tables were draped in red clothes, with picnic napkins, a mini-bail of hay as a centerpiece surrounded by one of the girl’s horse collection. There was an Arabian, of course! The party favors were cowboy hats and bandannas. The girls were too cute in braided pony-tails, jeans and plaid shirts. Lil Kinz even had boots passed on from an older cousin.

Table Decor

The TABLE

Mona had fun surprises in store. The boys were involved as bandits, having created a drama where two of the girls were kidnapped and the ‘gold’ (chocolate coins, also a table decoration) stolen! This led to a neighborhood-wide scavenger hunt to reclaim the girls and gold. BUT, before that, they had to cross a path loaded with rattle-snakes, and they had to stomp the snakes to get across to their goal. The snakes were long skinny balloons :).

 

 

Stompin\

Then is was craft time. Aunt Jane is quite creative, and designed those tied-fringe pillows, decorated with horseshoes, cactus and cowboy boots. After lunch they decorated picture frames with cowboy themed foam stickers, and of course, lots of bling rhinestones. The cowpoke brothers stayed downstairs playing chess, until lunch. 

Lunch was an event that kept four sisters and sisters-in-law busy for hours. Cowgirl burgers, corn on the cob, cottage fries, deviled eggs and a huge horseshoe cake filled with strawberries and covered with whipped cream. Aunt Jane is the Cake Queen, so it looked like something out of Chez Hilda. Delish, too. Just to add a touch of elegance in the midst of wild-West-ness, the plates and glasses were etched glass.

THE Table

After every dish was done and every pillow completed, us moms fell on couches comatose. A very happy coma.

***SO……..Didja  notice there are PHOTOS in this post? Thanks to Tech Wiz Niece Mona, who patiently instructed me in this ridiculously easy step.

California Dreamin’

We’re off to California bukra, yahoo!!!

First stop, my sister’s 400 acre ranch bordering a national park, with ten Great Pyrenees dogs, hundreds of sheep, one old llama, cows, peacocks and marijuana growing neighbors. The local fauna includes bears and mountain lions, so in spite of the lofty mountain grandeur, we only go for walks in groups atop horses (and Uncle A carries a handgun).

Next, a partialfamily reunion in Lake Tahoe! My bro and fam are back safe at their home and decided they NEEDED a vacation after all that drama, yay God! We are going to take the kids to all the places we loved growing up: lots of hiking, swimming, picnicking, craw-dad catching, river-rafting. We will be staying with a family with five kids, very cool folks who don’t mind pandemonium (like Aunt Jane).

Then, Orange County!!! Newport Beach, here I come!! We’ll be staying with a fam with SIX kids, just like the Tahoe family and Aunt Jane. Heh-heh, the people who call us right-wing-bottom-feeders have another word that actually works: BREEDERS. We’ll be seeing lots of friends, going to Knott’s Berry Farm, body-surfing and swimming in pools. We’ll spend a fortune on sunscreen.

One thing that WON’T be happening is meeting MAI! But, I’d much rather see her married to Sam Qwaider. Convenient match-making prayer answers: I love it when TWO I am praying for tie the knot. May God richly bless this union.

I’m sure I’ll have access to a computer, just enough to keep my addiction fed but learn some self-control as I do. See you in August!!!

Yet More Observations

1) Can’t find my fav soda, Diet Rite, anywhere. Boo-hoo

2) While searching for Diet Rite at a big wholesale place, got Post cereal 5 for $10 then TWO coupons for free half gallons of milk. Aunt Jane knows where all the deals are.

3) Project Boy in Jordan: “Mom, there’s nothing for breakfast”. Mom: “Honey, when we’re at Aunt Jane’s, there will be twenty-five different kinds of cereal to choose from. Eat your khubz and jam”. Project Boy after one week in America: “Mom, there’s nothing for breakfast”. Sigh.

4) Gourmet Hummous is ghastly bad.

5) Hometown Buffet on Sunday:

9:30am: Catholic ladies with pastel sweatshirts and sensible shoes come in after early Mass.

10:30am Lutheran and Methodists arrive in polo shirts and khaki trousers and crocs.

11:00am Baptists in dresses & ties and Evangelicals in skirts & more khakis and ALL their kids arrive (kids in Old Navy). Controlled, colorful smart-casual mayhem.

12:00pm White Assemblies of God breeze in with pastel suits and navy suits. Smart- business, mayhem exceeds control.

2:00pm Black Assemblies of God take the red carpet show with furs, satin, heels, matching hats, white suits with red shoes and hats, little boys in tuxedos and little girls in tulle and gloves. Out of control fun.

1:00pm is my favorite time to be at Hometown, so I can enjoy church people-watching .

6) Lil Kinz’ fav new shirt: “Will trade brother for pony”

7) The shirt Spikekid was NOT allowed to buy “Annoying Sister For Sale”.

The shirt I got Spikekid and dared him to wear: “My Mom Rocks”. It was on 75% off at Kohls, the only style at 75% off. Are there that few rockin’ moms in Illinois?

9) Did I tell you Spikekid is now within an inch of my height? I can still beat him arm-wrestling though.

Lil’ Kinz Breaks Her Arm

Not even a week had elapsed between History Buff’s cast coming off, and Lil Kinz’ cast coming on. Three kounouz in casts in eight months, it’s a family record!

She was playing with History Buff outside, and she fell off something and landed wrist-first. I watched it happen as I was walking up to call her to dinner, like one of those dream sequences where you can’t get there in time to help. I knew right away this would be a hospital visit.

Stay tuned for my foray into the American Medical System. After tonight, I’m wishing Dr. Amr Amr made American house calls.

JEERAN Baseball Creams the Competition :’(

Today, the JEERAN Kid Pitch team came from behind in the last inning to overcome an 8 point lead and win the game.

The same thing happened last week: 8 runs down and win in the last inning.

Sadly, it was McDonalds they beat, the team the older kinzayn play for, BOTH TIMES. It is a sad afternoon at Daar Al Kounouz.

Ya Omar, waynak? Yours is the team to beat!! Only two more games!

Cat Scratch Fever & Consequences

Got a kitty who goes out? Get her vaccinated, as there is a growing epidemic of deadly cat fever in the country. A vet once told me every few years such a virus decimates the local feral cat population, and it is has been awhile. Although I am not fond of feral cats, I am less fond of mice. FYI.

Aha…the truth comes out. It seems History Buff was warned by the PE teacher twice to get off said goal post. His injury then falls under the category of direct consequences for disobeying authority, which in our house, is a biggee sin. Authorities in his life: parents, teachers, coaches, police are people we teach our kids to obey without question initially unless they are asked to partake in what we deem to be wrong behavior. They are allowed to appeal to said authority if they have additional information which might change the consequences,  and are allowed to ask why if the tone of the question is information seeking rather than insolence. We are there to protect him from the full force of consequences he may not yet have the life experience to see. Sometimes, tho, the kid just wants to have fun, and he is pushing the envelope.

History Buff seems to be  entering adolescence, disrespecting mom, a teacher and now his baseball coach at different times.  He has been questioning his baseball coach’s decisions (she reads here, hey A!) and was pulled out of a game because of his ‘attitude’.  It took me about two hours of tearful discussion before he would relent and own his bad. We had communion at church last week, and I told him he needed to apologize to his coach personally before he took communion. He was mortified to get up in front of everyone (I’m not sure I could do it, then everyone wonders whats it all about!) so I told him he could go afterward. He did, and they are good now.

Then he breaks his leg due to disobedience, and can’t play his favorite sport.

Last night, as we were praying before bed, he said: “Mom, did God break my leg and make me miss baseball season because He is mad at me?” .  Oh, the theological questions that come up at bed time. I said: “Honey, God didn’t break your leg, and He doesn’t do revenge with disobedient children. He loves you and forgives you. BUT, He allows consequences to be a teacher if you dont’ listen. He puts authority figures in your life to protect you from the full impact of foolish decisions. You chose to move out from underneath that protection, and you will have to deal with the consequences of your actions. Or, sometimes, other people’s wrong actions. Can you trust God do do what is right in your life?”. He agreed he could, and he could trust me even when I ruin his fun for safety’s sake. And his coach, too.

I should be thankful he entered this stage at almost 11, where Spikekid was fully in it by 9. Oh, the mercy of God…may I learn about the consequences of my own actions in what I teach my kids.

Hubby’s home. Hallelujah/Sub7anallah!! All is good, I have my head back on. And, I am enjoying 370 grams of Lindt Swiss chocolate, slowly. Yum

Black BMW Sedan License #14-55834

What is it about black BMWs and Mercedes drivers that they just MUST exceed the speed limit? Yesterday, one of each sped through a residential area when kindergarten kids were getting out. Had a child run into the street, he/she would be quite dead, not enough of a body left for proper washing and burial.

Later in the day in a different area, when another school was getting out, this particular BMW passed me three times as if on crack while school children lined both sides of the street. It was being driven by a young man, his shirt even appeared to be one of the local private school uniforms. There were young children in the car, not buckled.

The third time, I braked in the middle of the road to make him stop so I could get a look at the license plate. This is it. I hope someone does something about it.

How many more lives will be cut short due to stupidity?

**UPDATE: Ali blogs about a four year old boy who was killed by such a driver yesterday. On his birthday. I am ready to start a MADD group - Mothers Against Delinquent Drivers.

Providentially Ordained Moments, Pre-Easter

I was starting to post about an amazing Easter Celebration, but realized it has just been an amazing week with which today’s Easter festivities were a culmination of joy. God’s hand has been upon us this week in a special way.

1) First, Abu Kounouz did have cancer in that tumor that was removed, but it was a superficial basal cell carcinoma and was caught early. All because we watched a movie which had Karposi’s Sarcoma as a theme and reminded hubby he should get that sore checked out. (Side note, but I must admit my error of judgement with the Dr’s stitching: the nasty stitches were removed, there is no bad scar. Sorry, Doc!)

2) I had a wonderful time meeting a bunch of ex-pat ladies at Um Omar’s to meet her mother. Lovely group of mover/shakers, some bloggers, some commenters, some ‘lurkers’ (I see you, M!), the food was delicious (shu, the biggest mound of guacamole I have ever seen, from PALI avocados!) and of course, my fav MommaBean who also brought HER mother.

3) Later that evening, our church youth group had a going-away potluck for several college students who had spent a ‘gap’ year in Jordan and had volunteered to help our young people grow spiritually. We had had a youth pastor for two years, but there had not been a suitable replacement. Our older teens decided to run it themselves, (with some parental investment) organizing VERY fun bi-monthly large group gatherings, and small group bible studies during the other weeks. The did an EXCELLENT job! I listened in on the one Spikekid attends, and was astounded by the maturity, leadership and practicality of teaching exhibited by the older teens.

The youth group is half the size of the church, and I believe their fire and commitment is bringing a form of spiritual revival to us all. We in the church are loving one another better, being more involved and more fully invested in one another’s lives. Listening to the kids lead worship and see the power point of the highlights of their year brought tears to my eyes. It seemed Easter began than night as we all saw how God had brought these college kids in such unique ways, and how they were touched by the investment they made in our kids.(oh yea, and the food was ‘church-potluck-at-it’s best’; I think one could measure spiritual revival by what kind of food the participants bring: there was food made from US-stash ingredients that took some time to prepare. Generosity flowed!)

4) The new car hadn’t been driving well, it seemed like it needed some alignment/brake work (hhmmm, a little too fast over those speed bumps perhaps Kinzi?). On the way to baseball (7:45am, mind you) a serious banging noise started while flying down airport road, and hubby discovered a piece of tail pipe missing. He then slowed down a bit and stayed to the right lane. Good thing, as not ten minutes later one the rear tires blew and shredded, and he was able to pull over without a problem. Had we been going fast, it may not have gone so well for a van packed with people. The man behind us pulled over and helped hubby change the tire, so we got to enjoy Jordanian hospitality in one of it’s best manifestations without mansaf! And not five minutes after that, a church family on the way to the ball field saw us, and promptly took the coach and kids to their game right on time.

5) After one of the baseball games, I was talking to a mother and some of her extended family I hadn’t met before. Just chatting, she asked me what I do here. When I mentioned the course for abuse victims, I noticed they all blanched. She leaned in and said “Could you spare some time to talk to us about this? We just discovered our family has been affected by this horror and we don’t know what to do”. I knew immediately God had brought me there just for those woman. They were so desperate for help they trusted a stranger they knew for ten minutes to help navigate a very difficult and delicate life tragedy. We spent a half hour talking, and had put together an applicable plan for the victim, the abuser and the family. I cried afterward, at the great love of God to allow that ‘chance’ meeting just when it was needed.

6) I had been way too busy, and my US-stash too barren to contemplate a real event Easter egg hunt for the kids. Then MommaBean came up with a plan that would be fun AND promised to be a huge return on little investment. I also found a mini-stash of suitable ‘hunt-worthy’ treats, and had just enough time post-baseball to power-color eggs and get the rest all ready. It was a delightful time for all the kids, and us adults too. Um MommaBean & Um El 3atal both provided my kids with some ‘grandma’ words and kindness. Thank you, Momma Bean, El 3atal, MimiBean, TetaBean and Helper Bean!!

7) After preparing the Traveling Pants for another journey, the rest of us (plus Gaza Girl :D) went to church for our evening Easter service. Pastor Rick gave us a dramatic presentation of the last earthly days of Christ, and the resurrection story, from the perspective of the Apostle Peter. From his confident outbursts, his denial of Christ, and finally that beach-side conversation with the Lord where he received His calling to ‘feed My lambs” it was a moving way to remind us all again the power of what we would celebrate the next morning. It kept my mind filled as I stayed up to midnight making cinnamon rolls to take to the sunrise service the next morning.

to be continued…

You Know You Where An ExPat Kid When…Pt 5

Yii, I don’t like it when I wake up to discover wordpress has changed the dashboard around! I was just beginning to poke around the other one, and now I have to re-climb the learning curve. Ya Matt, please, next time, give us mature folks a weeks notice to prepare!

Here is the final installment to this version of the list, I have a feeling readers here and linking the post on could come up with several more pages!

48. Seeing police drive on the shoulder of the road and cut people off is not unusual.

49. You understand that being addressed as “ma’am/sir” by Filipinos is not an insult.

50. You know someone is referring to Pepsi when they say “Bebzi”.

51. Having a walled in, cement house is standard.

52. Ford Explorer sized cars seem small compared to Toyota Land Cruisers and Nissan Patrols.

53. One word: ‘yala’.

54. You have a box of red label tea in your cupboard

55. You have ever had your hair cut in a “saloon”

56. Any time you submit an application, you attach 500 riyals to “help” it along. (so this one is from KSA?)

57. You roll your eyes everytime you hear a politician/news reporter say “eye-rack”

58. The speed limit is just good advice, not something really to pay attention to

59. You replace “uhm” or “like” with “yani”…

60. You are used to being refered to as “the white guy/girl”

Enjoy!! Hope ya’ll are well and enjoying these beautiful days.

Life As I Knew It Has Ended :)

No, no tragedies; just the arrival of baseball season. God has poured out great mercies, though, as all the Kounouz are playing and we only have practices two evenings a week. Additional mercies from the Hand of the Almighty through the hand of the Mr. Wise Commissioner: T-Ball games no longer begin at 8am on Fridays, and no sneaking 4 year olds on T-Ball teams for us team-moms to babysit. Heh-heh, yea, bring a copy of that passport and don’t even try the “My child is FAR beyond his abilities for his age!” song and dance. It never fails that these are the parents we never meet, who send the kid with a driver to every practice, and whose offspring are always try to whack other kids in the head with the bat for fun.

Abu Kounouz, aka Skeeter, wisely determined he could not coach this year with his wild and crazy traveling schedule. Um Al-Kounouz rejoices, as he and she are a team of coach and team-mom, and when he leaves, she is stuck with not only team-momming but also coaching the critters. Coaching makes her cross and whine-y, for she was made to cheer-lead, not coach.

My magazine writing career has careened off the road and into a ditch: unsuccessfully convincing a new editor I have worthy things to write (somehow, she wasn’t impressed with my Alexa and Technorati ratings. Nor my handbag: one editor told me handbags can be as important criteria to some magazine editors in Jordan as one’s writing skills). Another magazine has not able to pay for month after month (after month), and another producing so many mistakes I don’t tell anyone I write for them anymore. There is a bright new spot on the horizon, but I have learned those can be bombs as well as opportunities.

I’m good with this (except the not getting paid part, so how do I handle that without shaming them???), I’m getting kind of burned out and need to clear the decks for cleaning closets, summer travel and researching this book.

Not to mention being a good shepherd to my ‘flock’ of ladies in the process of abuse recovery in our last weeks together. This season of teaching has been a battle every week. Mutiny, resistance, numbness, excruciating pain, this particular group has been the absolute most difficult experience I have had yet. I lose sleep over them, get angry with them, am hurt by them, frustrated by their stubborn refusal to make good choices and and believe truth. I began to wonder if this group would be my first big failure to help any of them, and resisted my own temptation to withdraw and teach it outside my heart.

BUT this week, and the last, we’ve had breakthrough. I am SO proud of each and every one of them. This week’s progress, in ALL of them, was worth every previous tear and infuriated pillow-pounding. Every little baby-step forward has come at such great cost. My heart is tired and weary. I need some time to wait upon the Lord, that my strength may be renewed. Because, I have a new list of ladies waiting to take the course in September. Some of them have horrific stories, and have been patiently waiting their turn.

Well, that’s it for now, a look into Kinzi’s inner world.